4/09/2005                                                                                       View Comments

I commited the unforgivable sin... I became a skeptic

sent in by Matt

I will start now by saying that I have not had a bad experience with Christianity. It made me feel good and it gave me an answer for the inexplicable. I don't blame people for being Christians, nor do I hate them when they 'witness' to me. I was one of them, too. Some of my best friends are still Christian, and most of my family is Christian, with a significant portion of them Fundamentalist.

My most intense Christian experience came when I just started High School. My youth pastor invited me to a Bible Camp. I happily agreed, and my life was suddenly changed. Looking back now, a whole week of nothing but the Bible is enough to brainwash a person, but at the time, the Truth was revealed to me. In my mind and heart, it was Jesus time all the time. And I felt complete. I felt like I was finally in on something great.

Throughout high school and the beginning of college, I was the leader of anything Christian in my community and campus. I led mission trips around the world. I prayed for colleagues, and became close friends with them. I even saw miracles. Even now, looking back, these were positive times in my life. I see them from a totally different perspective now, but I wouldn't trade my life's experience for anything.

Then I met her. Tiffany. I fell in love with her (we're still in love, btw), and she took a shining to me. But she was a Witch, and I was a Christian. I saw it as a challenge. She didn't want me to 'witness' to her, but she was perfectly fine discussing our differences and what we believe. She listened patiently as I told her about Jesus and all the historical evidence and how He was God and was resurrected and all that happy horse shit. She said, "Prove it."

I did my research, read the Bible even more, and I prayed for her. In the meantime, she told me about her doubts with the Christian faith (I won't go into them, there are too many to remember). I began to think critically about the faith and beliefs I had held as truth for so long. I began to see the world as a joke. Nothing should be taken seriously. Who cares about us anyway? We die, and that's the end. Nobody will remember me, and I love that idea. I just want people to quit controlling me, and I'll get out of their face in return.

Thus I heard the voice of our mother Eris, she what done it all, the Goddess of Discord. I don't worship her, though. I just give her lip service so she doesn't get bitchy.

The End

Rapid City
South Dakota
USA
Christian since I was born
Left gradually from about 3 years ago
Was a Lutheran, United Campus Ministry, Methodist, etc...
Now a Discordian
I believed because it was the only thing I knew
I left becuase I actually thought about what the Church and the Bible was saying, and I was repelled by it.
Email: mattfred at gmail dot com

2 comments:

Cavaliere Pugrins said...

To those condemning Christians as "stupid" by invoking "proof" (or the lack thereof) and "rationality":

Christianity is wholly based on the belief that human logic is flawed. Asserting that Christianity is invalid due to its irrationality is pointless. Christianity IS irrational. Most Christians acknowledge this. It is not that they don't understand that their religion is logically flawed, it is that they believe their logic is incapable of analyzing the Truth.

Admittedly, I find the whole bunch of dogma rather boring. Still, I think the Christians deserve some respect.

Dave8 said...

Those victimized via brainwashing deserve humane respect, however, I reserve intellectual respect until the victim proves they can break past the illogical bands of tyranny that shackle their minds. In short, I can separate the person from the belief, however, I choose to separate myself from those who reside in a constant environment of "uncertainty" and "chaos", removed from logic. That environment, breeds dysfunction, and is rampant amongst small town USA churches.