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12/07/2007                                                                                       View Comments

Happy Holidays!


I think we should tell kids the truth about God and Jesus at a very young age, but let them believe in Santa a little longer. He's a much better role model for kids! He's never smited anyone, killed any babies, wiped out every living thing on the planet, ordered people stoned to death, or any of that nonsense. He doesn't want to be worshiped, doesn't demand animal or human sacrifice, doesn't care if we're circumcised, and as far as I know he's never sent a single soul to Hell.

Let's put Santa back in xmas!

Happy Holidays!

10 comments:

R. Black said...

OH YEAH!?! Ever see futurama?

Bobbert said...

Ha

Put Santa back in Christmas is a GREAT idea! At least then it makes sense. Virgin births, flock keeping in WINTER, Stars foretelling saviors, talk about fantasy!

Santa Claus said...

I am the "Real Reason For The Season", believe in me or I will punish all of you by not leaving you any presents under your tree this year.

Repent and give your lives to "Santa" and you shall have eternal life in the "North Pole" and we shall rejoice with Santa's elves. Just remember he knows when you are asleep, and he knows if you have been naughty or nice.

SANTA 3:16-20

stevie said...

<grinch-mode> Personally, I *hate* the whole Santa thing. Futurama's is the only modern Santa depiction that isn't stomach-churning, magic-belief promoting, schmaltzy claptrap. For my part I think kids should be told their loved ones paid for those presents - Santa is just the delivery guy.</grinch-mode>

Gary said...

I understand where you are coming from Stevie, however I'm also sure there are lots of parents who would tar, feather, and drag someone down the street for telling their children Santa does not exist.

I did that to my nephew one time, and I thought my sister was going to have a massive heart attack she got so mad at me.

RT Firefly said...

Let's see now, who would be the better role model for children and adults?

One one side we have Gawd/Jaysus
Engages in hate and fear mongering
Promotes bigotry
Demands that you worship him/them or burn forever.

One the other side we have Santa
Laughing
Happy
Sacrifices of himself to bring joy to other people no matter who they may be.
Asks only that you be good.

The fundies better look out, our the Church of Claus may put them out of business!

S. Claus said...

I AM Santa, and Stevie, you've been very naughty and you're getting coal in your stocking; no, scratch that, I don't do coal any more, I'll put in a battery with a note attached saying, "toy not included."

Seriously, I'm an atheist who plays Santa for money during "the season." In fact, I know another atheist who is also a for-hire Santa.

The timing of this cartoon is perfect, since yesterday I was doing a job, and I overheard one lady say that she had a friend who told all of her kids from toddler age that Santa was not real. Why? Because she was a fervent Christian and she only wanted them to believe in the Jebus magic myth and no other competing ones. I was thinking to myself, that my policy with kids is the exact opposite -- tell'em Santa's real and Jesus and Jehovah are fake.

Look at it this way, kids will figure out on their own that Santa's a mythical figure; the way I see it, it's practice for the same realization with sky fairies and messiahs on sticks.

eel_shepherd said...

People, people... No Santa? Stop a minute and use your heads. Does it make any kind of logical sense that Rudolph The Red Nosed Turtle would be pulling around an _empty sleigh_ on Christmas Eve?! What would be the point?!

Jim Arvo said...

Excellent point, eel_shepherd. As I've often pointed out, we have many eyewitness testimonies as to Santa's existence. Not only are there the reindeer, but there are multitudes of elves. Some try to dismiss their testimony as a shared hallucination, but what are the odds that so many elves would simultaneously suffer the same mental breakdown, and year after year? That just doesn't make sense. And what would Rudolph's motivation be to make up a story like that? You can't fake a glowing nose in any case. Either it glows or it doesn't. Did all the other reindeer just "pretend" they could see by this light of his nose? I don't think so. Scholars have long ago abandoned all those silly excuses. The best explanation is that Santa is real.

freeman said...

No wonder christians hate Santa so much, there are billions of dollars spent in filling his sleigh. This is all good money taken away from private jets, mc-mansions and limos for the christian demi-gods. Santa is great for the economy, religion does nothing. So I say long live Santa and keep those elves employed.