Dave: In honor of the hilarious "God -Of- The -Month " Club, I humbly submit the following battle of the modern deities for your amusement. Best, Robert To all of you fight fans out there, I don't need to remind you what a truly historic match-up this upcoming Duel of the Demigods is shaping up to be. Each fighter has his own strengths and weaknesses, and their differing styles and abilities should make this a classic bout. Let's take a closer look at the two fighters and see how they compare. Superman hails from the planet Krypton, and his actual name is Kal-El. El is of course Hebrew for God, so Superman's real name is God Kal, who is the Son of God Jor. Although his secret identity is that of Clark Kent, a mild-mannered reporter for a major metropolitan newspaper, he fights a never-ending battle for Truth, Justice, and the American Way. Jesus Christ hails from Palestine by way of Egypt, Babylon, Sumeria, and any number of ancient prehistoric cultures. His se...

...and yourself... Behind every successful man, there is a dutiful wife. This has always been true. In fact, no better example of Tradition can be found than the Tradition of marriage. We all have our roles to play. The man is the breadwinner, and you are the homemaker. It is a glorious calling. Learn to love it. All women strive to be perfect wives, but an important part of this is respecting your husband. As you learn to properly respect your husband, you will come to respect yourself as well. Never contradict him. He gets enough of that at work. Make his easedown from the workday smoother. Prepare the home for him. It should be clean, tidy and in good repair. He is your reason for being He should never have to help you in the kitchen -- even if he offers When he has had a particularly rough day at the office, do not bother him with chit-chat. Instead, offer him a foot-massage. He should never have to ask, "When's dinner ready?" It must be ready for him when he gets ho...

I stumbled on another "ex" Christian testimonial site tonight and was pretty damned impressed with the story I read. Although I empathize with the difficulties this young man went through to shed himself of irrational religion, I envy him that he was able to think so coherently at such a young age. Then again, why be jealous? At least I found freedom eventually, right? Interestingly enough, my 13 year old daughter is having some of the same discussions with me that this youngster had with his own parents. The parallels between my daughter and this person are striking. You see, to understand what I am saying you must realize that for over half my little girl's life, she was part of a completely committed, fundie, evangelical, non-Catholic, believing family. Naturally we attended church every time the doors opened, but we went far beyond that form of mundane devotion. For starters, we listened to only Christian music. Then, we memorized huge passages of the Bible together. ...

Let's face it, we have all played this game before. We were either on one team or another, and we always wanted to win! How about leaving some names for this game, and/or some rules in the comments section! Isn't this fun? If we do well, maybe we could market it! "Most people are religious, so assume it is true." Being a martyr Argument by cut'n'pasting huge reams of dense text. "You're scared of God, and want science to rescue you." "God is the cause of existence; things exist; therefore God exists." (and other Circular Arguments) "You just don't understand it, too blind to see Hypocrisy or self-contradiction)   "I have proved God exists - end of debate."   "Everybody believes in something ." or "You're not really an atheist." "Everything must have a cause - except my God" (and other Special Pleading) Threats of damnation. God of the Gaps fallacy ( science can't explain ...

I remember when the Shah of Iran was booted out of his country. He was definitely a US puppet and the regime that followed his ouster gave the world hell for years when that religious nut case the Ayatollah Khomeini took power. Now, as we attempt to dis-em-throne Saddam, I recall that the mayor of Detroit once gave him the key to their city. I am beginning to have a jaded opinion when it comes to US foreign affairs.

I have been avoiding it. I have been debating the appropriateness of opening the topic here. My 18 year old son is a member of the 26th Marine Expeditionary Unit currently assigned to the USS IWA JIMA, somewhere in the general vicinity of Iraq. A week and a half ago he was in the Mediterranean off the coast of Turkey. He called to say that he would not be able to contact anyone for quite some time. He was not permitted to give any reasons or details, only that he would not be making any calls for the foreseeable future. Everywhere I turn, people are offering to pray for him, and for us. I don't resent these comments because I understand that these people feel like they want to do something, and they just don't know what to do. To a Christian, saying that they are "praying for you" somehow placates their feelings of empathy. My son is married and his first child was born two weeks after he was deployed. He hasn't even seen a picture of his son yet. His wife is nea...

submitted by Tim Simmons Probably one of the most familiar passages in the New Testament is the Lord’s Prayer, which can be found in the gospels of Matthew (Matthew 6:9-13) and Luke (Luke 11:1-4). Jesus provides his disciples with a blueprint for proper prayer, contrasting the attention grabbing prayers of those who prayed in public with the humble and private petition with which we are all familiar. But hidden within the lines of that memorable prayer is a doctrine that proves problematic for the Christian. In short, Jesus is asking God not to steer the believer into a situation where they would undergo a temptation. The problem is obvious. Why would God actually lead anyone to be tempted to sin? The whole thrust of the Bible is a plea for the believer to avoid sin. The notion that God, perfect in his knowledge and incapable of sinning, would actually allow someone to be tempted is understandable if you believe 1st Corinthians 10:13 which says that God will not allow you to be t...

Here are some excerpts from Bob Jones University's website about Christians who teach science. "The Christian who labors in the field of science or science education does many things the same way that his secular counterpart does. To a great extent he uses and teaches the same facts and laws. His research equipment and instructional aids are much the same. Where, then, does the difference lie? Ironically, a major distinction is the fact that the Christian is more consistently committed to the key ingredient of the scientific method--observation--than is his unregenerate counterpart. The latter is often prone to rely more heavily on human speculations than on the data themselves, especially when they are inimical to his evolutionary-humanistic beliefs. The Christian is specially motivated to be scrupulously honest in both the recording and the interpretation of his data, for he does his work as unto the Lord rather than unto men. Other distinctives have to do with certain erron...

© 2001 Tim Simmons (Sung to the tune of Pass It On) It only takes one fib to get a legend going And soon all those around will suffer from it’s growing. That’s how it is with God’s love once you’ve experienced it. It doesn’t fit, it’s all bullshit. You’ll want to pass it up. What kind of heinous fiend would slaughter newborn babies? 1st Samuel 15 leaves no ifs, ands or maybes That’s how it is with God’s love once you’ve experienced it. It doesn’t fit, it’s all bullshit. You’ll want to pass it up. Uncleanness was a sin from high priest down to shepherd. So what can we conclude if Jesus touched a leper? That’s how it is with God’s love once you’ve experienced it. It doesn’t fit, it’s all bullshit. You’ll want to pass it up. The Bible is a mess With errors does it resound It says the Earth is flat The contradictions abound That’s how it is with God’s love once you’ve experienced it. It doesn’t fit, it’s all bullshit. You’ll want to pass it up. I’ll shout it from the mountain tops I want t...

Heaven's Gate Press Bible God installed Teddy Roosevelt as HIS new public affairs officer. Rumor has it that Yahweh has come under some criticism for past atrocities and is in need of a new image. "I was watching the movie "Monsters.Inc" and it occurred to me that I could be cute too!" said Jesus' Father in a public release statement. "I want young people everywhere to forget all about my terrible wrath and just think of ME as their own personal cuddle friend." stated the vengeful deity. Rumors about an eternal "Lake of Fire" being stoked for anyone who resists cuddling with the Omniscient One continue to plague the efforts of Mr. Roosevelt. Mr. Roosevelt realizing what a big job he was about to undertake, reportedly solicited the assistance in his efforts of none other than Joseph Goebbels. Mr. Goebbels laughed when questioned and said, "Ah Yes, I had my hands full too as I tried to reshape the public image of another famous dictato...

"If you love someone, threaten to burn them in hell for eternity." - God "Don't do as I do, do as I say." - God "You think YOU'RE a victim of child abuse?" - Jesus "I could prove my existence, but then nobody would get to go to hell." - God "That part about rabbits chewing cud, I meant that." - God "Love means forgiving even those who don't worship you." - Man "For I so loved the world that I sacrificed Myself to Myself to appease My own anger at My own creation." - God "Go to Hell." - God "If you don't worship me, I'll force you to live in a lake of fire for eternity. But I love you. No, really..." - God "It's the best I could do. I'm only omnipotent, omniscient, and immortal" - God "Worship me, or I'll torture you forever." - God See them all at God's Billboards

Copyright © James B. Jordan 1989 And Arpachshad lived thirty-five years, and became the father of Shelah . . . And Shelah lived thirty years, and became the father of Eber . . . and Eber lived thirty-four years and became the father of Peleg . . . and Peleg lived thirty years, and became the father of Reu. . . (Genesis 11:12ff.). The fact that the Bible contains chronological information cannot be disputed. What can and often has been disputed is whether or not that chronological information has any real value, either theologically or historically. It is my conviction, and that of many others including the sponsor of this newsletter, that Biblical chronology is extremely important, both theologically and historically. Chronology is the backbone of history. This is rather obvious and no one would question it. When we look into the matter, however, we are confronted with the question: What in fact is the chronology of events in the ancient near east? What is the chronology that forms the...

submitted by Gary McNutt 1. Where is the justice in punishing us for Adam's sin? If the bible itself says that children will not be punished for the parents' sins (Deut. 24:16). Furthermore, if God really created Adam not knowing either good or evil (Gen 3:22), how could such a harsh and enduring punishment as death for Adam and all his descendants possibly be just? Our secular courts are more just than God when they show mercy on people who cannot distinguish between right and wrong, such as children and the mentally handicapped. And why isn't this doctrine of original sin found anywhere in the Bible except in Paul's writings? Why didn't Jesus ever mention it, or teach it? 2. How could Adam and Eve ever have sinned if God had actually created them perfect, even if they did have free will? If God created them imperfect, how could a perfect omnipotent being create anything imperfect? 3. Why Pray? If it changes God's mind then he is not sovereign. If it does n...

© 2003 Tim Simmons “You must find the will of God” implored my new brother in Christ. I had just been baptized that Sunday and I didn't really know what Ed meant by that remark. But then there were many things I didn't’ understand as a new babe in Christ. As the years went by, I matured in stature and wisdom. I had recently graduated from Caldwell Seminary and was eager to serve God in whatever direction he led. I prayed each night and asked him, “God, what is it that I'm supposed to be doing?” I knew that the fervent prayer of a righteous man was effective but all I got was silence. Although I received no answer, it didn't discourage me because I knew that God worked on his own time frame and I also knew that God had a plan for every person’s life. Then one summer night after a long prayer session, the answer came unexpectedly. It was like a bolt of lightning – a flash and then it was gone. But I heard it distinctly as if God had spoken directly into my ear. ...

by Robby Berry Should ex-Christians who become agnostic or atheists "come out of the closet"? That is, should they tell their friends, family and loved ones about their newfound loss of faith, or should they keep it to themselves and pretend to be Christians? I believe that coming out is far better than staying in, for the following reasons: Staying in the closet is an emotionally draining experience. Most of us feel bad about deliberately lying, and really bad about deliberately lying to our close friends, family and loved ones. But staying in the closet requires precisely that. This generates loads of guilt, and carrying around that kind of guilt is pretty unhealthy from an emotional point of view. Making matters worse, you have to expend a great deal of mental effort to maintain the facade, a task made even more complicated by the fact that you are attempting to fool those who know you best, and thus are the most difficult to fool. Staying in the closet tend...