Jesus...f*** you
By Ian Hi Jesus. Jet me start out by saying F*** you. Yeah, that's right. F*** you. F*** you uncle f***er. What the f***? you ask. Allow me to explain. After careful consideration and a lot of thinking, I have come to the conclusion that you, as presented in the Bible and your followers, are a f***er. How so? Let's see. If people don't believe in you, you damn them to hell. Real nice and merciful. If you damn people to hell for not believing in you and thus harming your ego, then f*** you. If you damn people to hell for following Christianity, then f*** you. If you're going to damn ME for being a freethinker and a humanist, then you're a really psychotic son of God. Want to change your image Jesus? How about starting off by getting rid of all your spokespersons. Why not start with Billy Graham? He's a big motherf***er. I mean come on, wrinkly as a prune, thinks Satan is out to ruin the world, threatens us with hell if we don't believe, runs ...
Thats some crazy stuff right there.
ReplyDeleteGreat feature. If you read the bible Jesus's birth and death have different accounts. I don't see why christians don't question this.
ReplyDeleteThats what Matthew Mark and Luke are four different accounts from four different people and their perspctives. "No two people see the same or understand the same. Som whats new?
ReplyDeleteChrist was an alien to this planet and thats really all we need to know. He was a Celestial being, we are terrestial beings. We are bound to the earth He wasn't, and is not. He is the King of the Space men, of which their many, and few of us, earthlings"
To, make a long story short He will return again to earth.
"Time will tell"
And we have all the time in the world...
Anonymous,
ReplyDeleteQUICK...come up for air! Your brain is already suffering from severe oxygen deprivation.
Jesus is not my king. Us Space Men don't have one.
ReplyDeleteI've also thought about this zombie thing recently and it's really a major flaw in the bible.
No other historian records such an event happening.
Not even any mention in Josephus, or any Roman records, or Jewish records, or anything or anyone else's writings...
Surely it would have been mentioned, even if only attributed to their own gods.
All it takes is a moment to stop and think about these verses instead of just brushing over them in the flow of the passion story.
Of all the gospels Matthew is the biggest bullshitter. He's got the most bogus prophecy 'fulfillments' and the most ridiculous miracles, all on top of this big zombie farce.
Im just thinking about it and what if Matthew saw it differently and what he saw had a great effect on his feelings at the time. He would want to try to explain in a way , most likely poetic to him and others and dramatically as well,the way he felt when he saw this. Maybe actual dead people never rose but the people at the death of Christ may have looked so sad and deprived of there faith and beliefs that they litterally looked dead and had no feelings. The bible is filled with parables and metaphors, maybe this is just one of those. Im sure if you look throughout history you can see other peoples accounts that have used this sort of imagery to convey a message of how they were feeling. I hope this makes sense.
ReplyDelete