Jesus...f*** you
By Ian Hi Jesus. Jet me start out by saying F*** you. Yeah, that's right. F*** you. F*** you uncle f***er. What the f***? you ask. Allow me to explain. After careful consideration and a lot of thinking, I have come to the conclusion that you, as presented in the Bible and your followers, are a f***er. How so? Let's see. If people don't believe in you, you damn them to hell. Real nice and merciful. If you damn people to hell for not believing in you and thus harming your ego, then f*** you. If you damn people to hell for following Christianity, then f*** you. If you're going to damn ME for being a freethinker and a humanist, then you're a really psychotic son of God. Want to change your image Jesus? How about starting off by getting rid of all your spokespersons. Why not start with Billy Graham? He's a big motherf***er. I mean come on, wrinkly as a prune, thinks Satan is out to ruin the world, threatens us with hell if we don't believe, runs ...
This has just got to be a joke surely? When it comes to America I'm never quite sure.
ReplyDeleteWell, there's a show of brotherly love and compassion for the suffering of mankind for ya. Freakin idiots - how the hell do they know who is gay and who is not? Do they ask them? That right there shows the world how prejudiced those christians really are.
ReplyDeleteHmmm, I looked for this 'group' online and didnt find anything at all - and the broadcast does seem staged...what the hell is the onion news network? If this is a joke, it doesn't do any good at all to demean christian orgs, in fact it actually has a reverse effect in a way - someone would stoop so low as to falsly implicate someone else...terrible.
ReplyDeleteThe Onion is a very funny satire site. In my humble opinion.
ReplyDeleteThey are very good at showing how silly "humans" and "civilized" society is.
Regards, Bob
I know it's "The Onion", and it's satire, but when i worked for Lester Sumrall, they got up this whole system for moving food around the world. A C-130 Hercules and an ex-USN reefer ship.
ReplyDeleteOnly thing was, the food was for distribution to Xians ONLY. Yep, they went to Angola and handed out grub to the local missionaries. Wanna guess how many "heathen" the converted with rice Krispies?
Just like "resuce" missions, you wanna sammich? they wanna hear you say "The Sinner's Prayer"
Assholes
I sure can't spell tonight, can I?
ReplyDeleteSo it's the onion. Peel the layers of stupidity off and enjoy the flavor of satire. Or not.
ReplyDelete