April Fools!
By Doc Mike
Many of the stories in the Bible are so preposterous, even a child should see through the bullshit. But thousands of years later, fools continue to believe. When will the insanity end?
Happy April Fools' Day, everyone!
Many of the stories in the Bible are so preposterous, even a child should see through the bullshit. But thousands of years later, fools continue to believe. When will the insanity end?Happy April Fools' Day, everyone!
Comments
Will you please, like I just did, give yourself to God and ask forgiveness of your sins before your souls are lost for eternity?
...until I noticed the date!
Good one.
I am Louis XVII, the Bastard King of France
Unfortunately, children are the ones that are most likely to be sucked into the world of guilt and self-mutilation that is "Christian love". Children are gullible. Not really knowing what "love" is, but having been told how important "love" is, it's easy for them to be culled by the likes of creation science narrators. It's no wonder that the Biblical God wants us to be like children - full-grown adults should have the mental faculties to see what a load of BS the Bible really is, but children, more than anyone, will see a nice guy like Jesus getting flogged because he LOVES us, and the mean ol' Romans HATE us! WAAH!
*sigh* I hate Christianity.
Damn april fools day.
Will you please, like I just did, give yourself to God and ask forgiveness of your sins before your souls are lost for eternity?
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Spirula,
That was a darn sneaky trick you played on your 'buds' here today [g].
I'm afraid as PENANCE for fooling some of us, you'll have to spend 8 hours in a catholic church this upcoming Sunday.
In addition, before mass you'll have to do:
69 "Hail Storm Mary's", 3 "Act of Conceptions", 12 "Our Sky-Daddy's", and say the entire Rosary while scrubbing the blood stains from the unsolved murder that happened up on the alter.
If that's all not bad enough in itself, for company you'll have a certain Roman Catholic resident troll here, feeding you a bucket full of communion host and some really cheap wine to wash them all down with.
Keep in mind that your only ride home, will be aboard the Jee-Bus promptly at 6 PM.
You are to keep your mind off of anything sexual for the next month and that includes not tinkering with your Saint "Peter".
Now we don't want to hear any complaining from you; so let's not hear "NUN" of that stuff back from you.
Oh Spirula and all.....HAPPY APRIL FOOLS DAY
ATF (Who thinks saint peter, is all petered out now)
feeding you a bucket full of communion host and some really cheap wine to wash them all down with.
Mmmmm! That was some good god! Can I have seconds?
Mmmmm! That was some good god! Can I have seconds?
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[[ ATF fearing that something has gone awry, scratches his head wondering why Spirula seemingly has enjoyed his god-penance so much. He finally discovers what went wrong. ]]
Hey resident catholic troll, you were suppose to give Spirula the cheap red cooking wine to wash down that bucket of communion hosts, NOT those bottles of "Chateau d'Yquem Sauternes (1988)", from the cardinal's secret dungeon winery collection.
Those bottle of wine cost $500 each and were being saved to share with the blessed Virgin Susan, errrrrr Mary, when she finally pays her long overdue visit to us.
Spirula, you'll never get into heaven by enjoying yourself this much on earth.
Doing penance is suppose to make you into a humble, mindless, and groveling servant of the Holy-Casper and his two partners in delusion, Jesus H. Christ and All-Mighty-Mouse.
Now Spirula, you can redeem yourself by telling us that you managed to solve the case of that murder, up on the blood soaked cross?
ATF (Who always wondered what the "H" stood for in this christ name?)
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