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4/04/2009                                                                                       View Comments

Observations on Christianity

By Neil aka Mudflappus

Kool AidGlass of Kool-Aid by t-dot-s-dot

I once considered myself a Christian. The only positive attribute I can claim from this period of my life is the friends I made with some of the other pointy headed little kids that I endured a Christian Academy with. None of us really understood the concept of spirituality at that age and were content to snicker at biblical references to donkeys, bundles of sticks and the various noises our bodies were capable of producing in close quarters.

Through it all, I never once felt as if I fit in and concluded that I was meant for a different purpose. I became heretical much to the dismay of the more pious students, who shunned me for not following the script and simply drinking the Kool-Aid. Still, I defended Christianity with my own interpretation of scripture and my best attempt at common sense. As I have discovered, common sense isn't, and therefore I shed the mantle of Christian due mainly to Christians with whom I refuse to even associate myself with anymore. My journey lead me to a few simple truths about most blatant fundies I have had the misfortune of encountering:
  • Their will becomes God's will. Oh I know they'll tell you I've got it backwards but when God hates all of the same people they do I find it mildly amusing.
  • God's scriptural morality is often vague at best and yet a fundie can recite verbatim God's opinion on a variety of things including the most current political wedge issues. Once again, conveniently, their opinions concur seamlessly.
  • Persecution apparently means that you're not willing to simply allow them to roll over whatever your own beliefs are with complete impunity.
  • When faced with a verbal opponent that will not concede their position, a fundie will become the avatar of God and sentence them to Hell simply because that's where the fundie wants them to go for having the nerve to think differently.
  • Ignorance is truly bliss. Hence the imaginary war on Evolution, Charles Darwin, Carbon Dating, The Scientific Method, The speed of light, Modern Biology, Abortion, Birth Control and just about anything else that has advanced humankind in any way.
  • The very notion that they can "outbreed" other religions in order to "take back" a country that was never theirs in the first place.
  • They say that this country was founded upon Judeo Christian principles but can't name which specific principles these are.
  • The so called moderates will accuse you of painting them with a broad brush and yet think nothing of wanting to wipe their collective ass with our Federal or State Constitution in order to promote their petty prejudices concerning a group of people they don't like.
  • The so called moderates will accuse you of painting them with a broad brush simply because they lack a sufficient ability to justify their faith in the face of extremism.
  • They are right (exclusively)

I realize that none of these things are new at all and I'm sure they have been discussed at length in various forms here on this very site but this marks the first time I have ever personally placed them all in one place. (Mostly for my own benefit I think). As for myself, I have settled comfortably as a deist. I live and let live regardless of whether one wants to roll around in the aisle spouting gibberish, pray to the porcelain god after a bender of choose not to believe anything at all. It matters not to me unless one chooses to use their faith as a battering ram against my own or others.

As I continue to distance myself from that Rapture Crazed Doomsday Cult I find solace in my own definition of the meaning of life. To be satisfied with your own explanation for why things are the way they are.



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